FOUR: GET THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR HEAD.
IT'S NOT ENOUGH TO KNOW IT.
WHERE AM I?
Reminiscing and ruminating. Worry and Regret. My ‘self’ serves these up quite often. I have memories of exes. People from my past who treated me like trash. Horrible moments in my past where I lived in my car…lived homeless. Times where I was betrayed or used and thrown away. The funny thing is I think these thoughts and memories are served up when I am frustrated. But the frustration could be about anything. It could be a minor inconvenience. Something that is easily remedied with 20 bucks or a little patience. I turn something off when I meant to turn it on and it just annoys me and that feeling automatically connects to something infinitely more painful in my past or a fear I have of the future.
The stress swirls in my mind and little things not going my way turn into disasters in my ‘self’.
Just like that.
I am no longer here.
I am in my pain.
You can ‘LIVE’ in your head while your body floats around like a brain dead zombie in victim survival…always in anxiety. You can have fantasies of things NOT actually happening and people NOT actually here.
You can lose:
All sense of creativity…
The flow state…
Streaming in the now…
You DON’T want to lose these things. This is where the magic of being alive exists. You want to train yourself to not get worked up over the small things in life becuase you know they are coming anyway. They are small obstacles that take little to no time to overcome and should remind you that you are perfectly capable of meeting challenge after challenge. But it’s perfectly fine if you’re not there yet.
But at least for now understand that to be in the moment and to find a way to be in flow state is one of the greatest things you can do for yourself, and the first domino to knock all the rest of them over. It’s a special skill to get in and stay in flow state.
STREAM.
Stop intellectualizing present moment consciousness. There are no words to describe being totally in the moment. The present moment only demands attention, not explanation. You are not happy. Okay. Fine. Fuck it. You are not fucking happy where you are. Isn’t that simple? You just are not happy in this place. Maybe you are bored. Fuck it. Those are more stabs from the ‘self’ to get you back in your head anyway.
Be here.
I am not going to say it’s easy.
I am going to say it’s better than mentally or physically torturing yourself in search for something better in your own head.
I feel fucking afraid RIGHT NOW. I feel the pangs of anxiety screaming for me to smoke weed, watch movies, and forget all about my ambitions and my challenges which only exist in this moment. I want to sleep. I want to just turn this fucking day off. But WHY? Because it’s not really me screaming. It’s my ‘self’. My body is sick and tired of me ordering it around. It wants to drink and play video games or watch sports and just generally turn my focused thoughts off about the life I am actually wanting to live that exists here in this moment.
No TV show ever changed my life. No mixed drink ever turned my financial situation around. No blunt ever gave me a million dollar idea.
Allow the heaviness of the reality to hit you. Become used to swimming in it’s waters and know that if you are doing this clear headed in the moment you are achieving. And I literally mean that. Take your goals and burn them for a moment. HERE is the only goal; and you were born into it like royalty. Then the sales men, marketers, and social media influencers of the world did everything they could to pull you away. Kill the noise. Remove them mentally. For centuries they have been stuffing goals down your throat that you never wanted in the first place.
This over flow of useless thoughts is what robs you from streaming.
Streaming is the act of being in the moment and allowing insipired thoughts to travel in and out of your consciousess and superconscious. You don’t need to know about those either. Just be here and let inspirational ideas come and go. If those ideas happen to get you triggered or stuck in your head, those are not intuition and inspiration. Those are traps of the ‘self’.
THE BODY
Breathe deep for a moment. You breathe automatically. But you CHOOSE to breathe deep. One is survival. One is thriving.
SHADOW VS. STREAMING
You know deep down there is a difference between doing something because you know it’s good for you and doing something because you feel obligated.
When it’s out of obligtion, or fear, you’ve gone into a mind state of
DOING SOMETHING AND SUFFERING
while doing it.
From this point, you have two choices. Change the activity. Or see if there’s a physical way or thought stream to remove the suffering from the doing. Making it fun. Removing distractions. Create a situation that rewards you for interacting with life.
INTUITION & LOGIC
I hate the subject of intutition because it’s a thought process that requires a slave mentality. A thought pops up out of nowhere ‘requiring’ you to take some kind of action. And the idea is that you are to follow this thought immediately, without question, and without hesitation. That’s it.
It’s insanity.
But it’s also sanity.
The problem above all is that you can never know which one until you do it. At least that was what I was taught. Intuition got me money. Intuition took me to Hawaii. Intuition showed me a toxic part of my family that I never would have found otherwise. It got me out of other toxic situations. Intuition will terrify you. But that’s the point. That’s why you obey it.
A few pointers on intuition. If it’s something that is time wasting and useless and you know it immediately, it’s the ‘self’. It’s not intuition. If it’s something clearly harmful to you or others, it’s the ‘self’. Ignore that shit. There’s no infinite wisdom that calls for useless self-destruction or time wasting.
Logic is the enemy.
‘I’ll do it later.’
‘It feels irresponsible.’
‘It might upset someone.’
Logic is great when you’re trying to plan something out or work out some bugs in a system. But it’s insanely useless when you’re feeding yourself bullshit excuses for why you should NOT do something right fucking now. Unfortunately, I can’t tell you what lies will emerge in your mind. But, I can tell you that if the ‘logic’ is emotionally based, it’s not real logic.
‘I’ll do it later.’ - Procrastination.
‘It feels irresponsible.’ - Social Conditioning.
‘It might upset someone.’ - Fear and Lack of Individuation.
For now, all you can do is begin to pay attention to these thoughts and take action when the thoughts come up to begin flexing that muscle. The more you run and recognize your intuition, the more your intuition will serve up genius ideas. Again…If there’s ANY possibility that an idea that you have could really put you at some kind of REAL ACTUAL risk, skip it. (By the way, risk is not being worried someone won’t like you.)
I want to ultimately let you know that it’s up to you what you do with all these ideas. Because your mind will serve up a lot of them. Intuition is not an obligation, nor is it really magic. You can observe it, you can judge it, or you can drop it. You have full agency.
Your intuition needs programming, too.
SYSTEM
A few gurus might bitch and moan about it, but it’s a solid idea to keep and filter your intuition. If there are ideas that are larger projects, you can’t actually do them in the moment. Some ideas frankly need time to flesh out. Have a place for ideas. Check them once a week or once a month. Don’t let yourself get overwhelmed by them. Contain them and organize them but spend very little energy on them. Remember, these are raw ideas. If you have one that really stands out, then you can pluck that idea from your bank and start working on it. But I recommend that you don’t become the idiot that takes an idea half-way and then gets fooled by your ‘self’ to stop because it’s not working right away. That’s a recipe for self-destruction.
The systematizing of your intuition is what will actually give you an edge against it. You DO want to strengthen and trust your intuition. But you do not want to give it full authority.
FILTER
Filter out the stupid ideas. (High Risk.)
The revenge ideas. (Wasted Time and Self-Destruction)
The ‘spend all your money on an inspirational feeling’ ideas. (Gambling)
Buying someone a gift in hopes they will like you for it. (Whore Behavior)
I personally believe great intuition is in the moment…knowing what you already have to do and following it as best as you can. Being deeply involved in the activity. But the house always wins…and YOU are the house. Again, if there is any risk, it’s a FUCK no. If I like it and it makes plain sense, I do it. Worst case is I spent time and effort on a calculated move and it didn’t work perfectly. But I avoided disaster.
SPIRITUAL LOGIC
The arguments and logical structures in your head can simply be let go of...to be replaced by ‘spiritual logic’...energetic frequency-based relationships between PATTERNS of consciousness.
Stupid, right? I wish I could kick some of these gurus in the chest.
Just focus on the word ‘patterns’.
Spiritual logic is seeing HOW THINGS CONNECT, not how they isolate. Getting healthier could be what is connected to your income. Sleeping more could be connected to your relationships. It often doesn’t make complete logical sense. But you know it’s good for you. And what’s good for you is always linked to other things that are good for you as well.
Be careful of your ‘self’ interrupting to seek control and telling you something is a waste of time. It’s up to you to strertch your vision and see into the future. You decide what is a waste of time.
Find the connections. If they are not there. Make them.
Do you have the BALLS/OVARIES to fucking have a deep vision?
HOW DEEP?
$7/Month - OR - $43/Year
$45 Founders Special Ends NYD 2027
I bet you spent more than that on some fucking shoes.
